The universe doesn’t care about me at all.
Before I was, while I am, after I have been – no difference.
The old carp calmly draws his course at the ground of the pond. Somebody watching from above or not – who cares?
I, every thought of “me”, is totally insignificant.
To realize this, to have this certainty permeate every single cell, allows a big load to eventually fall off.
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A new day, the blue hour just before dawn.
A scent of springtime in the air. A flock of birds chirping in the tree next to the main station building.
Everything seems possible, a perceived infinite potential. The universe laid open all cards directly in front of you.
All weariness is suddenly gone.
And the human mind? The mind is in its own world again. Thinks of every day life, thinks of trouble, thinks of obligations.
Andreas smirks briefly. And then he welcomes this unexpected present.
A new day! To hell with the mind.
There is no path in front of you, no examples that you could possibly follow.
Every breath that you take, every step that you make, is a world premiere, is one-of-a-kind.
You are following your own course. Don’t let yourself be lulled by others who claim they have done something similar.
The universe does not know similarity.
The universe only ever knows uniqueness.
That uniqueness which is expressed through you.
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Really – there is nothing to do. The universe did not issue a secret mission that you need to accomplish. And even if you think you have a destiny in life, you won’t receive any gifts from the universe in case you have reached it.
The universe does not depend on you doing something particular or not. This incarnation does not become more valuable if you reach certain goals or not.
Your effort doesn’t make the universe better since it is already perfect. Your effort doesn’t make the universe worse either since you cannot soil the present moment.
Whichever way you look at it – there is nothing to do.
You may deeply relax.
And even this you don’t have to do.
Just a little reminder:
You can not control the person next to you.
You can not control feelings.
You can not control the weather.
You can not control thoughts.
You can not control the present moment.
You can not control life.
You can not control death.
You can not control the universe.
Control is an illusion.
I think you once knew that.
You are not worth less if you don’t achieve your goals. Just as you aren’t worth more in case you achieve them all.
Only the human part of you is thinking of goals. He who feels small and not worthy. He who is afraid of the raw taste of life.
How would it be if you just achieved your final goal? The long list that was with you for decades – every item crossed off. Now you accomplished everything. How would that be?
Do you think that would make you permanently happy and content? Probably not.
The goals in your life represent something. Something very fundamental. Essentially it’s your fear to be meaningless, to be unworthy.
But this must be a misconception.
Only you are bringing meaning into the world. Something would be missing without you. The cosmos is smiling at you. There is an admission ticket in your pocket. And it’s already devaluated.
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How would it be if your eyes really would see what’s going on in front of them? Because you’re not caught up in your stereotypes and anxieties.
How would it be if you would start every morning with a smile? Because every day a fresh universe appears.
How would it be if every person would be good for a surprise? Because one heart simply is connecting with another heart.
Sometimes everything is just too fast. Endless impressions staccato style, almost unbearably intense. Neon-like fragments flashing through bursts of consciousness. Eyes in distress – left, right, near and far.
Slower please! Isn’t there a slow motion button?
The heart is overflowing with emotion. No words that are getting halfway close to this wonder. Uniqueness and intimacy everywhere. Countless traces and imprints.
Slurring brain, drunk from the sway of the nameless here and now. “Slower please!”, almost pleading now.
The whole universe beams. Trillions of invitations, every imaginable movement is welcome. Impossible to err.
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This morning, very early, perhaps around 5 a.m. Eye opens and a whole universe appears.
A small section of the sky in the roof-light. A single star, whose light is falling into the eye.
Immediate contact, eye meets universe. Universe meets eye. That’s the point where thoughts are occurring.
Universe appears, thoughts occur, a body is felt. Time starts, Nobody who might be surprised.
Eye meets universe.
There is nothing else.
I guess you know them too: Umpteen photos and videos in newspapers and the media that are showing people with the corners of their mouths turned down. Lips firmly pressed together. Rigid facial features turned into permanent expression lines a long time ago.
I am rather sure: These people feel a lot of bitterness. Perhaps they are unaware of it or they are so used to their general mood that they find all this bitterness ordinary. Who knows?
Bitterness arises in numerous ways. But it arises for sure if we are debating with reality regularly. If we don’t let the world in front of our face be what it is. Which is that what is. Even more: Which is all there is.